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State of Maths
On Wednesday 31st December 1969 GMT at 7:00 PM GMT, swerytd said:
Yet another Tilt reject. Plenty more where this came from. This was quite an early one.
Dan
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STATE OF MATHS
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F/X: KNOCK ON DOOR
HEADTEACHER:
In!
F/X: DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
MATHS TEACHER:
You wanted to see me, Headteacher?
HEADTEACHER:
Sit down, Head of Maths. Have you seen this newspaper?
F/X: NEWSPAPER THROWN DOWN, PICKED UP AND LEAFED THROUGH
HEADTEACHER:
Page 8 suggests that more primary school maths experts are needed.
F/X: LEAFING CONTINUES
MATHS TEACHER:
8 – is that one little duck or the legs?
HEADTEACHER:
It's the one fat lady.
MATHS TEACHER:
Of course it is.
F/X: FRANTIC LEAFING
MATHS TEACHER:
Aha!
HEADTEACHER:
The percentage of 11-year-olds attaining level 4 and above at Key Stage 2 has gone from 77% to 59%.
MATHS TEACHER:
What a rise!
HEADTEACHER:
It’s a fall.
MATHS TEACHER:
Of course it is. A fall of... erm... 66 and a third per cent?
HEADTEACHER:
18—
MATHS TEACHER:
—*18* per cent! Disgraceful…
HEADTEACHER:
How many of our students are at level 4?
MATHS TEACHER:
Erm. (MUTTERS) One-two's is two. Two two's are five. Three two's is... (BEAT) 300%.
HEADTEACHER:
300% of our pupils are at level 4?
MATHS TEACHER:
Yes. Almost definitely.
HEADTEACHER:
Well above average then?
MATHS TEACHER:
Average?
HEADTEACHER:
(SIGHS) It states quite clearly in that report that the UK is one of the few developed nations where it's socially acceptable to declare you are useless at maths.
MATHS TEACHER:
Does it?!
HEADTEACHER:
Under the bit about teachers' basic requirement for training.
MATHS TEACHER:
Erm... yes... of course.
HEADTEACHER:
Tell me, Head of Maths, what is that requirement?
MATHS TEACHER:
Err... 'on-knee ger-ke-sur-eh iy-n te-he soob-jer-ektee'.
HEADTEACHER:
Was that 'One GCSE in the subject'?
MATHS TEACHER:
Erm... yes?
F/X: SIGH THEN BUTTON PRESS AND BEEP OF INTERCOM
HEADTEACHER:
School Secretary – get me Head of English!
END
On Wednesday 31st December 1969 GMT at 7:00 PM GMT, sootyj said:
It's not bad, but it's a bit obvious in some ways, and it's too long.
Reduce it to 2-4 lines of fast dialogue and you could be going places.
On Wednesday 31st December 1969 GMT at 7:00 PM GMT, Tuumble said:
Quote: swerytd @ May 13 2008, 12:45 PM BSTHEADTEACHER:
The percentage of 11-year-olds attaining level 4 and above at Key Stage 2 has gone from 77% to 59%.
MATHS TEACHER:
What a rise!
HEADTEACHER:
It’s a fall.
MATHS TEACHER:
Of course it is. A fall of... erm... 66 and a third per cent?
HEADTEACHER:
18—
View original
Wanting to be pedantic, the fall would only be 18% if attributed to ALL children. As we've established that 77% of children attained level 4 and above at Key Stage 2, you would need base your fall on the 77% figure. Therefore 59% would represent a 23.38% (approx) fall on the previous figures.
Just thought I'd clear that up.
Neat sketch BTW - I liked it.
On Wednesday 31st December 1969 GMT at 7:00 PM GMT, swerytd said:
I can honestly say, that's the most unusual critique I've ever had.
Despite the maths degree, I clearly understand as much about stats as I ever did...
Dan